Confessions of an Introvert

  1. Generally speaking, if I don’t feel like socializing, I don’t. And I have no problem declining an invitation without providing an exhaustive explanation. A simple, “Thank you for inviting me, but I’m afraid I won’t be able to make it,” is sufficient. 
  2. I don’t maintain superficial friendships. 
  3. I hate small talk, and I generally dislike environments where socializing, especially with strangers, is forced. Intimate gatherings and meaningful conversations are far more energizing and enjoyable.
  4. I cannot understand why so many people turn ordinary conversation into a competition, or game of one-upmanship. (Actually, I do have a few theories.)
  5. We are trained from an early age to confuse loudness, aggressiveness, bravado, and attention-seeking with strength. 
  6. I like people, but a great many of them talk too much.
  7. It is my observation that most people do not understand the value of solitude or silence.
  8. If you see me at a social gathering, and I am standing quietly away from the crowd, it’s probably because I am evaluating my environment and everyone in it. 
  9. I always have an exit strategy.
  10. I do not make myself accessible to everyone; nor, am I accessible at any time. 
  11. If you show up at my home unannounced, there is a chance I will hide rather than answer the door. (I almost always answer…but the chance remains.)
  12. I don’t like being the center of attention.
  13. I don’t mind listening, but it’s my experience that some people take advantage of the capacity to listen by talking about themselves incessantly. When this happens to me, I either mentally check out, or I enact aforementioned exit strategy. 
  14. If given a choice between meeting up with a friend on Monday or Tuesday, I will invariably pick Tuesday because it gives me an extra day to prepare.
  15. I don’t necessarily feel the need to respond to phone calls or text messages immediately. 
  16. I no longer care if other people think I am shy or aloof. I have my opinions about them, too.
  17. There are few moments more enjoyable to me than those spent curled up in front of the fireplace with a book and a cup of tea. It astounds me how few people seem to appreciate moments like this.
  18. There is a kind of inner strength that doesn’t need to announce itself.
  19. When I am in the mood to socialize, I generally find it enjoyable and even energizing. When I am not in the mood to socialize, I will go out of my way to avoid people, even people I like. It’s nothing personal. 
  20. There is one exception to all of these rules: birds. I always want to talk about birds. Even if I don’t feel like talking, I want to talk about birds. Indeed, if you engage me about a topic I am interested in, any sense of shyness or aloofness falls away. I can talk animatedly and for a very long time. 

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